i am no good with farewells.

everytime after a telephone conversation, i'll make sure i'm the first one to put down the phone. just so i won't hear the click sound that marks the end of it all. or i'll probably bid you farewell with a chirpy "alright, see you!" rather than a jolly old goodbye. similarly, it bothers me to look at the fleeting glance of the backview. i don't like to stand watching while people walk away. i simply cannot bear it.

i went to a wake just the past thursday. it was, well, a farewell in a way. as i was listening to the eulogy and overlooking a solemn crowd, i had to try so hard to stifle some chokes. bidding someone farewell is not something that everyone can do with grace; and i am the kind who is thankful enough that i don't bawl my rectinal out of my pupils.

in life, there are so many instances when we have to say goodbye. while some of the occasions may call for one, many a farewell may come too prematurely. there are however, too many of such occasions that demands such unusual grace. it is already not easy to say goodbye.

i, for one, hope to learn this skill of saying bye. to handle a farewell with understanding; to understand that separation is part and parcel of life, and essentially, to understand that goodbye itself, isn't in fact,

all that bad.