let's just say, 2008 did not rock at all.
not.

double negation makes a positive. that's an English lesson for you; but that is probably one of life's greatest lesson for me too.

just before the year comes to an end, i suddenly feel obliged to stay up to write an entry of the year that will soon-to-be passed. but trust me, this is not a random, fleeting thought like how most of my entries are; they are the product of an objective hindsight i have from 2008. and really, it was truly a year of negations that worked out positively.

taking up worship leading in church
i had such a hard time adjusting to it at first. i was suddenly thrusted into the limelight and exposed to the scrutiny of the public eye. my spiritual life was under a perennial pressure and all the more, it took a turn for the worse because i just couldn't keep up. but i thank God because it was this stress that drew me to God's tenderness and sensitivity. this characteristic of God saved me and added a new dimension to my understanding of Him. i grew in my intimacy and comprehension of God! completely amazing!

joining Overseas Volunteering Expedition 2008
i had thought that it will be a smooth-sailing project that we can enjoy while planning; BUT NO. it turned out to be one of the most savage (yes, i use this word) experience of committee work i have ever done! there were many nights when i lost sleep from all the planning, worrying and brooding over the work-to-be-done. it was during that period of time where i constantly fell sick too! but guess what? i ended up with the most spectacular overseas volunteering experience i could ever asked for when i was in laos! everything was perfect for me. God also gave me FANTASTIC FRIENDS from OVE 2008! my 10 lovely group5 people is a physical manifestation of joy and warmth. they are one of the biggest presents from God this year!

studying as an English Major in NTU
i whined and pestered God to give me nus and to burn ntu down (well, He didn't. that's why i'm still there). i complained about ntu and my no-prospects course so much that i think su guaning never recovered from flu. yet, English Literature is truly the course for me, a God-given passion even. i really thrived very well there! i got a scholarship and received good GPA (even though this sem is ---, i proclaim the next 5 sems to be STRAIGHT As!). best of all, i made like-minded friends (jeffer,van,renf,serene,lola&dawn) who are so indispensable now! God made things right when i thought it was bleak.

mentoring the sec2 cell
they were one of my greatest worry at the beginning of the year. actually, they still are. there were missing sheep and issues difficult to solve. i was also nervous that they wouldn't get used to me. i was fearful that i cannot tap their potential and become a godly leader. but i thank God for a fruitful year in the teens ministry. they became a helluva blessing for me and the best thing is that i had so much fun with them! the responsibility is great, but the fruit of the labour is so much greater!

being self sufficient
that means not taking moolah from my parents and in turn, giving them moolah. i have officially began maintaining myself. all the tuitions really killed me though. at my peak, i had 7-8tuition sessions a week. i was basically surviving on the winks i can catch from travelling one place to another and the coca cola my tuition kid's mom offers me. it was THIS bad. but you know, i thank God for sustaining my bank account and giving me extra- i travelled to taiwan, hongkong and laos on my own expense and paid single-handedly for my own driving lessons! i have never been more sufficient!

i typed this not to spite any of you. in fact, it's the complete opposite of it. there were so many obstacles i had to clear, matters that sapped me dry and issues i have to deal with. besides all that, i had a frailing health, relational commitment and other church servings to worry about. but you realise, it was grace that brought my thus far. it was God who made all things good.

i cannot tell you that 2008 was a happy, sweet and gorgeous year for me. it was NOT. what i can tell you is that in bad times, God really carried me - and it was evident in 2008. that, i believe, makes 2008 a year worth celebrating, remembering and cherishing.

multiple negation makes a positive.
you don't need the dictionary to tell you how real it is.